Thursday, February 26, 2015
Saturday, February 21, 2015
that you would consider me .. ?
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who am i that you would consider me?what is my life that you look out for me?
am i not dust, handsfull of ashes?
from earth is earth
dust from dust
ashes to ashes
it is written that you made them a little lower than angels
yet you crown them with honour, putting everything under their feet
under my feet?
surely not ..
not mine
who am i
that you consider me
and look out for me?
who are you
that you consider me
and look out for me?
who are you that you would step away from your place
and take mine?
i am but dust! ashes!
how could you?
why would you?
you have become dust and ashes ..
.. . .
i am dumbfounded by you
dumbfiunded
no words
you overwhelm me
my breath is caught still in my lungs
i cannot breathe for the thought of you
i am overwhelmed
there are no words
your love slays me
absolutely
i can barely see you
my eyes cannot bear your glory
and yet .. i see you!
i see you!
windblown hair
burnished skin on
dusty sandalled feet
eyes .. eyes that will not let me go
show me you
i want to see you
speak to me
i want to hear you
breathe in me
i want to breathe your breath
love me
i want to love you
take me
mould me
breathe your life into me
anoint my eyes
illumine my mind
massage my heart
i would be you
move in you
you in me
breathe you
see you
touch you
breathe through me
see through me
touch through me
me in you and you in me
..
all i ask
Thursday, February 19, 2015
as the sand on the seashore ..
some friends are discussing a passage of scripture that lends itself to various interpretations ..
some are worried about the possibilities
the passage speaks of serious issues
more poignantly, some are worried about the idea of even discussing it altogether .. as in, why not just leave it be? Or, why throw this out there for the immature christians?? they could be misled, even to the point of attacking their faith!
well .. what of it?
I remembered one time I recommended a book to a friend on a controversial topic; the response was “will it challengge my faith?”, or similar; the idea being, if it causes me to doubt, then I'd better not read it ..
well .. what of it?
from my perspective, faith is not the absence of doubt.
in fact, faith is most evident when doubt is present, for it says “even though i'm not sure about this, I trust God anyway.” it's moving ahead in the face of my doubts.
question: why didn't God simply lay it all out in propositional format; this is the way it is, do this/don't do that; believe this, not that .. ? God certainly could have, no?
what if the bible was a chart, a map, a plan, a dogmatic statement of the way things are?
this is what God expects in this circumstance/that life/those conditions/this country/that region/this time in history, and you either follow suit or ..
if that was the case, then where does engagement come in? And christianity is all about engagement, all about relating; relating to the God that is, relating to this Earth in which we live, relating to family and schoolmates and work-associates and church. Absolutely.
and .. what about faith
the more I read scripture the more I see the critical centrality of faith (romans, hebrews, Jesus)
if everything were laid out where would be the need for that critical faith?
the mere fact that this discussion is in play on that passage of scripture spells 'engagement'; people are talking, discussing various thoughts, arguing positions. and that, my friend is a good thing. when the church is talking and communicating and engaging, there is life. and that's a good thing. Life.
more significantly, it engages God.
when we have doubts and we go to God, God is pleasantly engaged. God loves that. Absolutely.
don't you love it when your children talk to you, ask you stuff, question this or that? we should. it's a promising sign of relating; we see their quizzical mentality, their wanting to understand, and perhaps most encouraging, their wanting to talk to us about it. relating is everything, and the failure to understand that is the root of many familial issues, as well as both relations among church and our relationship to God.
it signifies maturing.
maturity is what it's all about with God.
trust, even in the doubt, pursue it, engage God, Scripture and church, and mature in the process.
grow.
stretch.
another aspect of this is the at-odds nature of life. life butts heads. life is plus as well as minus.
there's good and there's bad. there are friends and enemies, there's birth and death, strength and weakness, plenty and poverty.
ours is to accept that and to embrace it ..
embrace. we don't see God in the face of our enemy if we don't..
it boils down to seeing God there, in the enemy's eyes .. refer to Jesus for more on that.
so, my mind on it is that I accept the bad with the good, and walk on looking to spread the good I have, maybe stymie the bad a bit here and there.
if I shun the bad, I fail in that.
if I turn my back on the evil, walk on the other side of the street, I fail.
if I see evil and refuse to engage, I fail.
when doubt slaps me in the face, and I bite down hard and reject doubt, I fail.
mine is to turn the other cheek.
mine is to face the doubt and trust God in the face of doubt, to see the hurt, the failure, the fatal illness, the drunkenness and mental challenges and addiction, the atheism and anti-God and hatred and war and prejudice and .. bring some modicum of Godness to the situation, the life.
if I can step into the dark and bring some light with me, even flickering candlelight, I walk Jesus into that darkness.
thing is, this life is a conundrum, an at-odds, a puzzle, a maze, a big huge question mark.
accept it, and walk it, looking to Jesus, the Forerunnner and Perfector of our faith..
that is faith; the kind of faith God is looking for.
a faith that engages and persists and endures, right in the face of doubt and mystery and attack and in-your-face hatred and death.
like Abraham, the father of faith, who trusted God even though he couldn't see, didn't know where, couldn't fathom 'as the sand on the seashore' .. just like that.
trust and persevere in the face of opposition and doubt and naysayers .. because this is God we're talking about ..
and God is so into faith .. as it is said, 'without faith it's impossible to please God' ..
if we knew everything and understood everything ..
we would be God ..
thank God for faith in the midst of a dark and broken world where hope and faith and love persist in the trenches of tragedy heartache and suffering
accept the challenge
engage
persist
pursue
persevere
God is pleased with such a life as this
some are worried about the possibilities
the passage speaks of serious issues
more poignantly, some are worried about the idea of even discussing it altogether .. as in, why not just leave it be? Or, why throw this out there for the immature christians?? they could be misled, even to the point of attacking their faith!
well .. what of it?
I remembered one time I recommended a book to a friend on a controversial topic; the response was “will it challengge my faith?”, or similar; the idea being, if it causes me to doubt, then I'd better not read it ..
well .. what of it?
from my perspective, faith is not the absence of doubt.
in fact, faith is most evident when doubt is present, for it says “even though i'm not sure about this, I trust God anyway.” it's moving ahead in the face of my doubts.
question: why didn't God simply lay it all out in propositional format; this is the way it is, do this/don't do that; believe this, not that .. ? God certainly could have, no?
what if the bible was a chart, a map, a plan, a dogmatic statement of the way things are?
this is what God expects in this circumstance/that life/those conditions/this country/that region/this time in history, and you either follow suit or ..
if that was the case, then where does engagement come in? And christianity is all about engagement, all about relating; relating to the God that is, relating to this Earth in which we live, relating to family and schoolmates and work-associates and church. Absolutely.
and .. what about faith
the more I read scripture the more I see the critical centrality of faith (romans, hebrews, Jesus)
if everything were laid out where would be the need for that critical faith?
the mere fact that this discussion is in play on that passage of scripture spells 'engagement'; people are talking, discussing various thoughts, arguing positions. and that, my friend is a good thing. when the church is talking and communicating and engaging, there is life. and that's a good thing. Life.
more significantly, it engages God.
when we have doubts and we go to God, God is pleasantly engaged. God loves that. Absolutely.
don't you love it when your children talk to you, ask you stuff, question this or that? we should. it's a promising sign of relating; we see their quizzical mentality, their wanting to understand, and perhaps most encouraging, their wanting to talk to us about it. relating is everything, and the failure to understand that is the root of many familial issues, as well as both relations among church and our relationship to God.
it signifies maturing.
maturity is what it's all about with God.
trust, even in the doubt, pursue it, engage God, Scripture and church, and mature in the process.
grow.
stretch.
another aspect of this is the at-odds nature of life. life butts heads. life is plus as well as minus.
there's good and there's bad. there are friends and enemies, there's birth and death, strength and weakness, plenty and poverty.
ours is to accept that and to embrace it ..
embrace. we don't see God in the face of our enemy if we don't..
it boils down to seeing God there, in the enemy's eyes .. refer to Jesus for more on that.
so, my mind on it is that I accept the bad with the good, and walk on looking to spread the good I have, maybe stymie the bad a bit here and there.
if I shun the bad, I fail in that.
if I turn my back on the evil, walk on the other side of the street, I fail.
if I see evil and refuse to engage, I fail.
when doubt slaps me in the face, and I bite down hard and reject doubt, I fail.
mine is to turn the other cheek.
mine is to face the doubt and trust God in the face of doubt, to see the hurt, the failure, the fatal illness, the drunkenness and mental challenges and addiction, the atheism and anti-God and hatred and war and prejudice and .. bring some modicum of Godness to the situation, the life.
if I can step into the dark and bring some light with me, even flickering candlelight, I walk Jesus into that darkness.
thing is, this life is a conundrum, an at-odds, a puzzle, a maze, a big huge question mark.
accept it, and walk it, looking to Jesus, the Forerunnner and Perfector of our faith..
that is faith; the kind of faith God is looking for.
a faith that engages and persists and endures, right in the face of doubt and mystery and attack and in-your-face hatred and death.
like Abraham, the father of faith, who trusted God even though he couldn't see, didn't know where, couldn't fathom 'as the sand on the seashore' .. just like that.
trust and persevere in the face of opposition and doubt and naysayers .. because this is God we're talking about ..
and God is so into faith .. as it is said, 'without faith it's impossible to please God' ..
if we knew everything and understood everything ..
we would be God ..
thank God for faith in the midst of a dark and broken world where hope and faith and love persist in the trenches of tragedy heartache and suffering
accept the challenge
engage
persist
pursue
persevere
God is pleased with such a life as this
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
prophetic challenge from within ..
I follow Jesus only
not any man or organization
however, truth is truth, regardless of where you find it out who says it
Richard Rohr speaks truth often
I don't agree with him on everything.. but who am I ..
the following is rohr's ..
"In the Hebrew Scriptures, the central institution of Temple sacrifice, priests, and Levites attempted to balance itself with prophets, or the legitimation of official, sanctioned critics, even though they usually killed them in the end. But at least the immense institutional prestige and authority of ritual and priestcraft was balanced by the charismatic authority of the truth-speaking prophets. One was an inherited and ascribed status, the other was earned by speaking truth with no formal legitimation ever possible (Deuteronomy 18:9-22). There is no ordination for a prophet. So you can perhaps sense the inherent tension between prophets and priests, and also between prophets and kings (2 Samuel 12:1-7). Kings and priests were maintainers of social order. The prophets were disrupters of the social consensus. Within the system there is inherent conflict but, ideally, also a balance.
The priestly class, the scribes, the lawyers, and the temple formed a structured, rational religion. Prophets focused less on the rational, and spoke more from the right-brain, from intuition, through poetry and images and what they referred to as oracle, trance, or divination. To the prophets, everything revolved around faithfulness to Yahweh. For them it was all about the purity and integrity of the divine-human relationship, which led them to point out the immense injustices of their world, their kings, and their priests.
Prophets, by their very nature, can't be right at the center of the social structure. They cannot be full insiders, but they cannot throw rocks from outside either. Their structural position to this day is "on the edge of the inside." You must know and live the essential rules before you can critique what is not essential or not as important. (See Jesus do this masterfully in Matthew 5:17-48.) As Moses, the first prophet, learned, once Pharaoh is your benefactor and protector, there are many questions you can't ask anymore. You can't ask about liberation of slaves in Pharaoh's house, nor do questions of justice or equality make it to the dining room table. And if you do ask such questions, you will not be answered, but quietly--or savagely--eliminated. Is this not obvious? I think it would be very hard to preach the real Gospel in the White House, under any President of the USA, Democrat or Republican.
After Christianity became the established religion of the Western Empire in the 4th century, the priestly mentality pretty much took over in both East and West, and prophets basically disappeared. The Emperors even convened the Councils of the Church for many centuries. I have never come upon a single church in the whole world named "Christ the Prophet." Maybe now you know why. The top of the hierarchy was where almost all clergy henceforth resided, and usually in the good company of kings and princes who were their patrons. That is the perspective for most of preaching and Scripture interpretation for the next 1700 years: from white, European, educated, comfortable, often celibate males. I am one myself, and we are not all bad. But we are not all--by a long shot! It is time for the democratization of the Church, and Scripture has given us all the needed building blocks to do just that (e.g., 1 Corinthians 12, Galatians 3:26-29).
My father, St. Francis, saw this problem in the 13th century and refused priesthood himself (he conceded to some early ordinations in the community, but only if such friars were first committed to radical poverty and humility). Pope Francis is evoking the same Gospel spirit, and I pray for his success and protection. What an irony that the ultimate establishment person would take the name of a non-establishment saint. It shocked the world, because we do not expect prophecy from popes. I am not sure we have ever seen a pope and a prophet in the same person in all of history!"
not any man or organization
however, truth is truth, regardless of where you find it out who says it
Richard Rohr speaks truth often
I don't agree with him on everything.. but who am I ..
the following is rohr's ..
"In the Hebrew Scriptures, the central institution of Temple sacrifice, priests, and Levites attempted to balance itself with prophets, or the legitimation of official, sanctioned critics, even though they usually killed them in the end. But at least the immense institutional prestige and authority of ritual and priestcraft was balanced by the charismatic authority of the truth-speaking prophets. One was an inherited and ascribed status, the other was earned by speaking truth with no formal legitimation ever possible (Deuteronomy 18:9-22). There is no ordination for a prophet. So you can perhaps sense the inherent tension between prophets and priests, and also between prophets and kings (2 Samuel 12:1-7). Kings and priests were maintainers of social order. The prophets were disrupters of the social consensus. Within the system there is inherent conflict but, ideally, also a balance.
The priestly class, the scribes, the lawyers, and the temple formed a structured, rational religion. Prophets focused less on the rational, and spoke more from the right-brain, from intuition, through poetry and images and what they referred to as oracle, trance, or divination. To the prophets, everything revolved around faithfulness to Yahweh. For them it was all about the purity and integrity of the divine-human relationship, which led them to point out the immense injustices of their world, their kings, and their priests.
Prophets, by their very nature, can't be right at the center of the social structure. They cannot be full insiders, but they cannot throw rocks from outside either. Their structural position to this day is "on the edge of the inside." You must know and live the essential rules before you can critique what is not essential or not as important. (See Jesus do this masterfully in Matthew 5:17-48.) As Moses, the first prophet, learned, once Pharaoh is your benefactor and protector, there are many questions you can't ask anymore. You can't ask about liberation of slaves in Pharaoh's house, nor do questions of justice or equality make it to the dining room table. And if you do ask such questions, you will not be answered, but quietly--or savagely--eliminated. Is this not obvious? I think it would be very hard to preach the real Gospel in the White House, under any President of the USA, Democrat or Republican.
After Christianity became the established religion of the Western Empire in the 4th century, the priestly mentality pretty much took over in both East and West, and prophets basically disappeared. The Emperors even convened the Councils of the Church for many centuries. I have never come upon a single church in the whole world named "Christ the Prophet." Maybe now you know why. The top of the hierarchy was where almost all clergy henceforth resided, and usually in the good company of kings and princes who were their patrons. That is the perspective for most of preaching and Scripture interpretation for the next 1700 years: from white, European, educated, comfortable, often celibate males. I am one myself, and we are not all bad. But we are not all--by a long shot! It is time for the democratization of the Church, and Scripture has given us all the needed building blocks to do just that (e.g., 1 Corinthians 12, Galatians 3:26-29).
My father, St. Francis, saw this problem in the 13th century and refused priesthood himself (he conceded to some early ordinations in the community, but only if such friars were first committed to radical poverty and humility). Pope Francis is evoking the same Gospel spirit, and I pray for his success and protection. What an irony that the ultimate establishment person would take the name of a non-establishment saint. It shocked the world, because we do not expect prophecy from popes. I am not sure we have ever seen a pope and a prophet in the same person in all of history!"
Saturday, February 14, 2015
valentine's is for velentines .. guess i'm going here again ... .. ..
what we've allowed the corporate-driven media to do to us is simply sad
all in the name of the almighty $
example: valentines day is now the #1 western holiday in china = 20% of the world's population = every 5th person is chinese ..
i recently read 2 articles on a christian web site, both to do with love
one basically said that the author was wrong all their life; love isn't codependency, it's allowing each to be their own self, with their own life, independent, while agreeing to share part of their life with each other in a relationship.. here http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/no-you-dont-complete-me?utm_source&utm_medium=Email&utm_content=1%20Thumbnail&utm_campaign=RELEVANT%20Newsletter
the other basically said that love isn't so much feeling and emotion - that won't last; it's a choice
here http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/lie-about-falling-love?utm_source&utm_medium=Email&utm_content=Life%204&utm_campaign=RELEVANT%20Newsletter
firstly, i don't wish people 'happy valentine's day'
people aren't my valentine
secondly, love isn't love; that is, there's love and there's love
love for my 'neighbour' is not the same as love for my lover
the two exist on vastly different levels, if you think about it a bit
lovers' love is so very much codependency
absolutely is
the lovers form a separate unit (think union) whereby they are each other's other
and love is not a choice
absolutely is not
it fundamentally flows form an irrepressible desire to be with/part of/share/experience together/crawl inside each other and get lost forever, and 'i don't care if the world drops off the edge of the universe' ..
that may sound childish, but when that sort of attitude is not there, it's my belief that love is defective .. something's wrong
from a bilical perspective, love is the union of two souls in a way that no other person gets to be united with either of them
this is evidenced by the fact that God gave that union sex, a shared experience solely and specifically designed to radically deepen and strengthen that relationship, blessing, and adding blessing upon blessing in the form of children
a simple read through Song of Songs (or Song of Solomon) adds much fuel to that fire
there we witness (for example) an unquenchable fire in the breast of a woman who ventures out in the wicked dark of night in search of her lover, and will not give up until she finds him
it's like she was divided in two when he wasn't around
absolutely
and there's much more of the same in there ..
God divided the first human into two, making male and female, distinct in characteristics, and then God brought the two back together and said 'cling' to each other, 'be one flesh'
how do you diss' that?
why do we have to justify our 'failure' at love by undermining what God intended, rationalizing with modern psychothink?
it's unbecoming of people that name the name of Christ
just because you (or i) don't have that love does not grant us permission to downgrade love to suit our situation
either it's love, or it ain't
of course there's commitment
of course there's determination to hang-in during bad times
of course you can't always expect the emotional content to be asyoulikeit ..
but that does not define love
we can't just redraw the circle to suit us
for the incredible portion of us that don't have it ..
we can pray for it
we can work at making the relationship we're in the best we can, providing all the fuel we can muster to help God answer our prayer
choosing to love in the hope that genuine love for my lover ignites ..
but love is love, friend
don't throw it out because most of us don't have it
peace to you
and love ..
all in the name of the almighty $
example: valentines day is now the #1 western holiday in china = 20% of the world's population = every 5th person is chinese ..
i recently read 2 articles on a christian web site, both to do with love
one basically said that the author was wrong all their life; love isn't codependency, it's allowing each to be their own self, with their own life, independent, while agreeing to share part of their life with each other in a relationship.. here http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/no-you-dont-complete-me?utm_source&utm_medium=Email&utm_content=1%20Thumbnail&utm_campaign=RELEVANT%20Newsletter
the other basically said that love isn't so much feeling and emotion - that won't last; it's a choice
here http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/lie-about-falling-love?utm_source&utm_medium=Email&utm_content=Life%204&utm_campaign=RELEVANT%20Newsletter
firstly, i don't wish people 'happy valentine's day'
people aren't my valentine
secondly, love isn't love; that is, there's love and there's love
love for my 'neighbour' is not the same as love for my lover
the two exist on vastly different levels, if you think about it a bit
lovers' love is so very much codependency
absolutely is
the lovers form a separate unit (think union) whereby they are each other's other
and love is not a choice
absolutely is not
it fundamentally flows form an irrepressible desire to be with/part of/share/experience together/crawl inside each other and get lost forever, and 'i don't care if the world drops off the edge of the universe' ..
that may sound childish, but when that sort of attitude is not there, it's my belief that love is defective .. something's wrong
from a bilical perspective, love is the union of two souls in a way that no other person gets to be united with either of them
this is evidenced by the fact that God gave that union sex, a shared experience solely and specifically designed to radically deepen and strengthen that relationship, blessing, and adding blessing upon blessing in the form of children
a simple read through Song of Songs (or Song of Solomon) adds much fuel to that fire
there we witness (for example) an unquenchable fire in the breast of a woman who ventures out in the wicked dark of night in search of her lover, and will not give up until she finds him
it's like she was divided in two when he wasn't around
absolutely
and there's much more of the same in there ..
God divided the first human into two, making male and female, distinct in characteristics, and then God brought the two back together and said 'cling' to each other, 'be one flesh'
how do you diss' that?
why do we have to justify our 'failure' at love by undermining what God intended, rationalizing with modern psychothink?
it's unbecoming of people that name the name of Christ
just because you (or i) don't have that love does not grant us permission to downgrade love to suit our situation
either it's love, or it ain't
of course there's commitment
of course there's determination to hang-in during bad times
of course you can't always expect the emotional content to be asyoulikeit ..
but that does not define love
we can't just redraw the circle to suit us
for the incredible portion of us that don't have it ..
we can pray for it
we can work at making the relationship we're in the best we can, providing all the fuel we can muster to help God answer our prayer
choosing to love in the hope that genuine love for my lover ignites ..
but love is love, friend
don't throw it out because most of us don't have it
peace to you
and love ..
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
finding me ..
I cannot be who I am not
I can only truly be who I am
unfortunately we sometimes don't like who I am
we assume other identities in some unreasonable effort to be a me that's really someone else
it cannot last
anyone I allow to live in my private space will soon enough recognize the inconsistency I am
why do I
not like the me I am
why do I
put on some other identity
pretend, makeup – hypocrite = mask my self
I am imperfect
in the place I see my imperfection, I may see it 'perfected' in some other, and assume that perfection in them as my own, masking my imperfection
and then that other imperfection .. I makeover that to fit the perfectedness in that other person
and on and ..
and I no longer exist ..
save deep inside me, where noone can see .. noone goes there but me
in all my ugliness, my imperfections, my failures
my blackened soul
the longer I look at the madeover me, the more I convince me that's who I am
I endup becoming in my mind the me I am not
I lie to my self
I am a lie
.. selah .. . . . .
in the world of truth, as I see it, we are broken
I get that 'truth' from the christian scriptures
in my brokenness I am therefore not the me I should be
the solution is certainly not to disguise my self to become someone I am already not
the real me is beautiful
for I am created by Creator God in God's image, something like God
that's got to be beautiful
got to be !
the solution, then, lies in recreating the me I am into the me I was designed to be
and the place to start is recognizing fairly who I truly am in my brokenness
anything else is a lie
and I don't want to be lying to me about who I am
to get there takes a whole lot of humbleness on my part
a whole lot
it calls for admitting, confessing, calling-me-out
and to do that means I have to know who I really am
opening those sturdy old creaky doors where the WHOIAM hides
shining light in each chamber, calling the METHATIAM out into the light
identifying that as me
seeing the METHATISTHERE
walking those me's out into the open where I live
and looking at them all, seeing them all there, together ..
now I have all of me in one place
that, my friend, is a scary thought
and it takes a very brave person to walk into those dark chambers ..
or a very tired person
or a very bottom-of-the-barreled person
or an end-of-the-rope-person
“I can't do this anymore ...” …
some of us journal to get there
we pull up our holey socks and pick up that pickaxepen and start to swing at the rock walls that hide our me
sometimes we get tired swinging the pickaxepen, our soulal shoulders and back ache ..
have to stop, rest
but we go back because we have to uncover the METHATISTHERE ..
have to
day after day
hour upon hour
I dig at my self
dig up my self
shine light in there
swinging my pickaxepen
laying me out on paper, piecebypiece, as I reveal another part of me
I'm so tired
and so very disappointed
is this really the METHATIAM?
can't I just crawl back into those chambers, deeper still, into the darkest of the blackness ..
.. and die ? ..
I don't think I can live with me
but wait !
Wait !!
remember
IAMWHOIAM
to stop now would mean .. . . I may never see my complete entire self in one place at one time
I would still be lying
to me
i would still be a lie ..
I must go on
even if it takes forever
I have to know who I am
the METHATISME
then .. maybe then, I can find a way to change into the MEIWASMEANTOBE
the MEIWASCREATEDTOBE
that is worth knowing
so, pickaxepen in hand, I resume my tiresome dreadful task
as more and more of me is mined
more and more of the METHATIAM emerges and takes shape
ahh .. now I see ..
oh my !
wait ! no ! not that ..
piece by piece
the secreted me melds with the “ok” me
a new being
I can see me taking shape
things I hate and things I like and things that're cool and things that aren't ..
keep at it ..
then what .. ?
well, there's this ..
that same Creator God that created the MEIWASMEANTTOBE is quite in love with me
really ..
yes, really
you mean .. even the METHATIAM?
absolutely
.. wha ? how could that be ?
I can only tell you what I know, I can't explain it .. i'm not Creator God
.. . .
but .. won't I have to change the sickening things about me first ? I thought i'd have to change first ..
it's not the changed METHATIAM Creator God loves
it's the MEASIAM
the thing for me now is to see the METHATIAM as the METHATIS and accept that
I must accept me as I am now ..
that's for sure step 1
then confess “ this is me “
after all, that's the me Creator God loves ..
when I turn to face Creator God in all my brokenness, my shattered ugly self exposed along with the MEILIKE, Creator God is able to help me become the MEIWASMEANTTOBE, the me God intended me to be
but first
I have too see me as I really am, and accept that me as me
that's where I have to get to first
once I get there, the sky's the limit
I can fly
I am free !
IAMTHEMEISHOULDBE
and that is unbeatable
'cause now the 'imago dei', the image and likeness of Creator God in me, is clearly visible to me, and for all the world to see
.. . selah ... . .
there's only one person that ever perfected that
his name is Jesus
he's my mentor
I follow him .. or try to, best I can
I want to be just like him, 'cause that's what Creator God intended, for us all to be conformed to the image of Jesus in me
that's where i'm headed
join me
it's an incredible journey into real life, life as it should be, life fueled by Godenergy
real life
peace
Monday, February 2, 2015
childish children ..
“ Unless you become like little children, there's no way you will enter into the kingdom of heaven.” ..
huh?
that's one of those sayings of Jesus I used to '?' in my bible .. over and over, wherever I saw it ..
couldn't figure what he meant, and he never explained it really
sometimes he added something to provide some insight
sometimes I think I know what he meant .. kinda .. maybe
a child obeys ..
sometimes
a child doesn't question ..
sometimes
a child is innocent ..
sometimes
.. .. .
the more I read scripture the more I become aware of the central and integral place 'trust' holds over humanity
trust
romans reeks of it, as does hebrews, as does Jesus' teachings ( like the first 5 chapters of John's telling of the good news.. )
that's why the children of israel had to wander around for 40 years in the widerness and were barred from entering the promised land .. the kingdom?
the issue with God seems to be "trust me"
"trust this man I have sent to you"
trust the imago dei in me
trust the conscience that says "this is real, mate"
trust the gentle tug at my mindstrings that calls “come, this way “
i can't speak for others in other places, other societies, other religions
i'm only able to truly speak to my experience, my own understanding of life in my society, my upbringing, and the things that spoke to me along my path
so there's that
“Allow the children to come to me! Don't stop them for of such is the kingdom of heaven.”
that kingdom that Jesus preached wherever he went
that kingdom that's rather difficult to define (check the theological experts)
is it there or here
is it then or now
is it external or internal
is it real or metaphorical .. like when he said “the kingdom of God is among (within?) you” .. .
that kingdom
as in “ thy kingdom come “ ..
what is 'children'?
who?
what does it mean?
and then I think of my own children, when they were very young
the joy
the freedom of play
the simplicity of their insight
that made me smile
reminded me of their utter vulnerability
like when their baby-hand grabbed my thumb ..
or when i silently peeped to watch them in their crib, on their back,
legs curled up, reaching for some hanging toy,
or looking for that noise through the window
oblivious to the worldatlarge, the news, the plunging economy,
the scramble for money, war and rumors of war, death, heartache
.. . .. .
how do I be a child?
I need to know
I want to be part of that kingdom
I want to ..
i'm wondering .. .
maybe ..
maybe implicit trust has something to do with it
like Jesus kept saying
maybe it's like just lying there, totally chilled, legs curled upwards, staring into the eyes of Abba as a 50-somethingyearold
losing my independence
for dependence on God
dropping the facade, removing the mask
no makeup, unshaved
naked and unaware of it
pulling at his beard
totally chilled with notacareintheworld
and if by chance I rolled off his lap headed for the floor
quite unaware and uncaring
been there, done that
his hands are quick to save .. blinding fast
maybe ..
maybe it's a mindset that flows headfirst from my heart
that simply wants to follow
be with Jesus
simply be
be
watching him
listening
catching the sound of his breathing as he scrambles uphill
watching the sweat swell on his forehead as he gathers and breaks up wood for the coookfire
trying to get inside his aura
right in there, close
almost atone
asone
no barriers
no barbed wire or picket fence
no tv
nothing separating or disturbing the Spirit of oneness
maybe ..
maybe it's a sense of Matthew 6
dropping the worry and the constant concern with eating and dieting, clothes and rags, roofs and bare sky
maybe it's internalizing and trusting that Dad's got me covered
simple as that
maybe that's it right there
simple
simplicity
complete unattachment to worry and concern about me 'cause somebody bigger more able that loves me got-my-back, period
and there will be no time, no circumstance, no threat, no fear of falling, no power on this planet or any planet or in the universe that can 'pluck me out of his hand', 'cause God is my abba, and Dad got my back
and I simply be
be his child
trusting Dad
i'm really just a child covered in old skin and grey hair and aching joints and thoughts of what's-this-life-for and "man! how i've wasted my life .." and wondeing how on earth i could've been so wrongallalong and why it is i refused to simply follow my conscience and .. and . . .
simply ..
simple ..
too simple ?
too childish ?
maybe ..
but i have to know
i just have to
everything depends on it ..
peace and love to you
huh?
that's one of those sayings of Jesus I used to '?' in my bible .. over and over, wherever I saw it ..
couldn't figure what he meant, and he never explained it really
sometimes he added something to provide some insight
sometimes I think I know what he meant .. kinda .. maybe
a child obeys ..
sometimes
a child doesn't question ..
sometimes
a child is innocent ..
sometimes
.. .. .
the more I read scripture the more I become aware of the central and integral place 'trust' holds over humanity
trust
romans reeks of it, as does hebrews, as does Jesus' teachings ( like the first 5 chapters of John's telling of the good news.. )
that's why the children of israel had to wander around for 40 years in the widerness and were barred from entering the promised land .. the kingdom?
the issue with God seems to be "trust me"
"trust this man I have sent to you"
trust the imago dei in me
trust the conscience that says "this is real, mate"
trust the gentle tug at my mindstrings that calls “come, this way “
i can't speak for others in other places, other societies, other religions
i'm only able to truly speak to my experience, my own understanding of life in my society, my upbringing, and the things that spoke to me along my path
so there's that
“Allow the children to come to me! Don't stop them for of such is the kingdom of heaven.”
that kingdom that Jesus preached wherever he went
that kingdom that's rather difficult to define (check the theological experts)
is it there or here
is it then or now
is it external or internal
is it real or metaphorical .. like when he said “the kingdom of God is among (within?) you” .. .
that kingdom
as in “ thy kingdom come “ ..
what is 'children'?
who?
what does it mean?
and then I think of my own children, when they were very young
the joy
the freedom of play
the simplicity of their insight
that made me smile
reminded me of their utter vulnerability
like when their baby-hand grabbed my thumb ..
or when i silently peeped to watch them in their crib, on their back,
legs curled up, reaching for some hanging toy,
or looking for that noise through the window
oblivious to the worldatlarge, the news, the plunging economy,
the scramble for money, war and rumors of war, death, heartache
.. . .. .
how do I be a child?
I need to know
I want to be part of that kingdom
I want to ..
i'm wondering .. .
maybe ..
maybe implicit trust has something to do with it
like Jesus kept saying
losing my independence
for dependence on God
dropping the facade, removing the mask
no makeup, unshaved
naked and unaware of it
pulling at his beard
totally chilled with notacareintheworld
and if by chance I rolled off his lap headed for the floor
quite unaware and uncaring
been there, done that
his hands are quick to save .. blinding fast
maybe ..
maybe it's a mindset that flows headfirst from my heart
that simply wants to follow
be with Jesus
simply be
be
watching him
listening
catching the sound of his breathing as he scrambles uphill
watching the sweat swell on his forehead as he gathers and breaks up wood for the coookfire
trying to get inside his aura
right in there, close
almost atone
asone
no barriers
no barbed wire or picket fence
no tv
nothing separating or disturbing the Spirit of oneness
maybe ..
maybe it's a sense of Matthew 6
dropping the worry and the constant concern with eating and dieting, clothes and rags, roofs and bare sky
maybe it's internalizing and trusting that Dad's got me covered
simple as that
maybe that's it right there
simple
simplicity
complete unattachment to worry and concern about me 'cause somebody bigger more able that loves me got-my-back, period
and there will be no time, no circumstance, no threat, no fear of falling, no power on this planet or any planet or in the universe that can 'pluck me out of his hand', 'cause God is my abba, and Dad got my back
and I simply be
be his child
trusting Dad
i'm really just a child covered in old skin and grey hair and aching joints and thoughts of what's-this-life-for and "man! how i've wasted my life .." and wondeing how on earth i could've been so wrongallalong and why it is i refused to simply follow my conscience and .. and . . .
simply ..
simple ..
too simple ?
too childish ?
maybe ..
but i have to know
i just have to
everything depends on it ..
peace and love to you
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