alone ..

i see you
   standing stopped
      there
fiddling with some fidget
   from your pack
all alone
   as usually you are
      when i see you
         standing stopped
            there
..

what have you there                 ?
what do you there                     ?

who are you                              ? 
   and why are you all packed   ?
       all alone                             ?
          as usual                           ?

   why is you usual                    ?
      alone                                   ?

..

what is your question               ?
      ?

who will you ask
   alone                                     ?

been there/done that ..

here's a prickly thought ..

if we're going to accept the biblical accounting of both the comprehensive attack on Jesus
   and his unviolated purity in response to that attack
then we're going to have to face the fundamental challenge to our minds
   of the unlikelihood of the truth of it
   from a human standpoint ..
      and he was human


say that again
   to believe that Jesus was 'tempted in all points as we are'
   while free from submission to any temptation
      is a mind warp for us in our fallenness ..

         but it is a necessary faithhold ..
   we need it
because the source of our comfort in the attacks we ourselves face is the robust understanding that this Son of Humanity (Son of Man) understands our specific plight
   because he himself was confronted in every way that we are confronted
      and successfully endured         
                                                            ( read Hebrews 4:14,15 )
..

let that soak in

selah ~


there is great comfort in that
and hope
and energy ..

our Liberator is not an advisor
he is our Forerunner
he has gone the distance
   a far greater distance than we will ever understand or experience

so then
   we can trust this Jesus
      intimately
to walk with us in understanding through our stuff

`|`

postscript :-

the thing that makes Christianity so different
   is the present caring intimacy of Jesus in our human experience

rocks and bones

rocks hurt

they break bones                         shatter my humanity

..

why cast them at me            ?

did you lose your mirror      ?     did you lose your humanity   ?      

erupt ..

how do i put words to it      ?
this pain
this anguish
this swelling heat inside me that wants to burn a hole in my life
this fire i cannot contain
   is breaking out
      and i want to let it

i want to let it
   burn a hole in my life

Jesus did ..
he gave his life to the fire
   that flew around him
   like some Wind
      unstilled
      vibrant
      intentioned
      powered

i don't know how to
i just want to
and i am
   in passion

normal .. not . .. .

hurt people
broken people
damaged people
bleeding people

trying to appear normal
to fit in
to not be cast out

sometimes the damage floats to the surface
   and we bleed out
      the blood saturates
         people see
                  they reach for gloves and mops

anger rises
   my head burns       red
      at me

i let them see !
   now i'm marked
   now i'm in not
   now i'm out

         have to go
                           start all over
                                                             again


maybe this time
i can keep the cover on
     staunch the flow

         look normal
                 accepted
                                          in

at the name 'Jesus' ..

why the name Jesus   ?

" .. at the name 'Jesus'
every knee will take the knee
and every tongue will agree
   in declaring
      this Jesus is Lord
and GodFather will get the glory "

the same GodFather that graced to him the name that is beyond every name that is named
that by that name every other name may be graced favorably

he who is the I Am Who I Am
took a name in Jesus
   to become familiar to us
      to remind us
that by that name
   every other name may be included in the grace extended to every
      and none be left out
         or left behind

for the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all

so then let this mind be yours
   the mind of Christ Jesus
who, being God
   emptied himself
      and became human
   and further humbled himself in submission
      even to death
         a death-cross death

this mind

the Christ mind
   that was named in Jesus

that mind

                            may it be mine

ebb and flow

the ebb and flow of me in my breath-y being
call to mind the stilled sea
   where you walked ardently
      where just a minute ago she raged
         blustering
            looking to unfoot you
..
same waters
now calmed
   bearing your footprints along
..

oh come !                  walk here
                   
leave your footprints
                                  in the breath of me