faith, out of the darkness ..

talking with someone
mentioned i had never been to europe
his response .. we are an infant nation
their boredom is ennui
as in 'boredom with an air of antiquity'

that unexpected crass response to a simple comment jars the mind
it stems from an experienced sense of distress and disappointment
a blatant negativity underlying a simple response to a simple statement
a depressing worldview
a hopeless (?) taste to whatever the menu
a sense of what's-it-all-for
uselessness

and then, as i walk away in shock at his vulgarity on this bright sunny day, after a day or 3 of rainy stuff
i pour cold water over my mind
and shock my self back to reality

my reality is not so apparent
or hopeless
it's more of a perception
a reality that lies in shadows
out of the direct light of the sun
a reality gained by adopting a spiritual worldview infused by the Spirit of Creator

it requires faith
and a willingness to use faith to see what would otherwise be not-so-visible
hiding in the dank darkened alley between 2 tall buildings

faith
illuminating
seeing what's there
what's hidden in the alley

out of that vision rises a certain sense of meaning
bringing significance to an otherwise gloomy human history, even history with an air of civility
allowing for hope, even in the rearview of dispondence at the utter meaninglessness of it all
the massive waste
the persistent ruination of good
evil dressed in the savoire faire of 'class', with an extended pinky, daintily holding a cuppa

hope

erupting from faith
in a world where what is seen is not what is ..
the goodnews of Creator that leads to cosmic reconciliation is grounded in faith from beginning to end
'from faith to faith'

it spikes the hopeless cocktail
adding a perspective of significance to an otherwise boringly useless world of suffering and abuse, where the only escape apart from faith seems to be eat-drink-and-be-merry.. for-tomorrow-we-die

thank God for Jesus
for Scripture
for the spiritual glasses tinted by faith
for the energizing electric hope and meaning for a view with a future
from age to age

there is meaning to life, the answer to ' what's this life for ? '
found in faith that brings substance and evidence to the table

find faith ..

meaningless life, and the fear of being insignificant ..

a wise man said recently that Peter, in his infamous denial of knowing Jesus, was not afraid of Rome, or the association with Jesus as such
his was the fear of insignificance ..

he was the go-getter, the up-fronter, the first to volunteer
he thought, like everyone else, that Jesus was here to institute the kingdom that would overthrow Rome and restore Israel to it's privileged place in God's worldplan .. now
their interpretation of Messiah was the King Saul persona, man among men, strength in armies and horses and chariots
a king like other kings

they missed the Isaiah Suffering Servant Messiah
the one that took the full force of humankind's hate and rebellion and unGodlikeness and powerlust
and disregard-for-neighbour
and me-firstness
humanity's arrogant sinbentness
they left out the part that said his visage was marred
   beyond recognition ..
conveniently left out    ?
who wants a beaten Messiah  ?

for Peter to believe he was forwarding the powerful overthrowing domineering kingdom of Jehovah Sabaoth, the Lord of Hosts, was perhaps what compelled him to be the first in line
he wanted to be known as one of Messiah's primary supporters
even to death
hence his arrogance (?) in saying “Even if I have to die with You ..I will never deny You!” 
And all the disciples said the same thing.
they all followed his lead
the outspoken, passionate warrior for Messiah . . ..

the fear of insignificance ..

is that me    ?
or
you         ?

.. .

if we can get past the lust for stuff
and more stuff
making us income-generators for the sole purpose of consuming upon our lusts
   which the majority of us never get past
.. if we can just think about life and meaning and progeny and life long enough to reset our corporate-media-driven worldview
then maybe we can consider the morality of our lifestyle
in the face of massive worldhurt
poverty and all that is contained in that word - hunger, thirst, nakedness, disease, dislocation, homelessness, prostitution, childprostitution, slavery and virtual slave labour, childslavery, abandonment, marginalisation
abuse piled upon abuse ..

then maybe we too can be accused of the search for significance
like Peter ..
as in, that's the first step

. .. .  ...      .

Jesus taught in very simple ways
mostly, he simply did
he talked too, and taught
he hungout and laughed
but he worked from the common person's perspective, not that of the privileged
he became homeless
comandeered no horse or ass
wore no extravagant clothing
ate on the fly, shucking corn like any other peasant
fixing a fired fish-breakfast on the seashore with his friends

his significance was not to be found in the things of this ruined world system
it was found absolutely in God, on whom he consistently and persistently relied for everything
even his daily bread
.. he who fed thousands with 5 loaves and 2 fish
..  . . ..    .

one of the issues he dealt with, often, was the true nature of leadership
translate - being a servant
translate - giving rather than lusting for
translate - loving enemy
translate - laying my self out for others
translate - allowing my self to be abused for the Kingdom of God
   ( we run from that one
   particularly in current theological circles
   where we rationalize our search for significance
   by positing our christian response to war and violence and hatred
   through attempts at passive resistance ( or some similar phrase )
   while trying to maintain our dignity ..
   our concept of significance .. )

one time Jesus met the disciples on the beach
they had been fishing
they didn't recognize him
   ( i guess it's tough for the mind to accept that recently they saw him
   severely disfigured, hanging in deaththroes
   now the resurrected Jesus, newlife born out of death )
he ate fish there on the beach with them

and there he asked Peter the 3 famously confusingly nagging questions
" do you love me  ? "
3 times
always bothered me
why 3 times
as if Peter was daft ..
i read the commentators and sermons on it ..
one notable insight is the 3 denials of Peter vs. the 3 questions
3 times he denied he knew Jesus - he figured he wouldn't be associated with another failed would-be Messiah ..
Jesus counters
   now that this was the third time he appeared to them after his death
   now that they finally believed ( understood ? )
   what he had been priming them for all along
with the pointed 3 questions that Peter, like us, surely was confounded by
" do you love me ? "
3 questions/3 denials
3 questions/3 answers

the answer Peter gave probably ( hopefully ) came from a renewed perspective
" of course ! you know that i love you "

the answer Jesus gives, each time
   to Peter's answer
is
the
answer
" feed my sheep "
" shepherd my lambs " ..

perhaps the true value of life is found precisely in my own insignificance
as i try to let Jesus live through me
taking care as best i can of other sheep like me
'cause maybe they're still journeying
still seeing him hanging
and not on the beach ..

see, it's not passive-resistance-while-maintaining-my-sense-of-dignity-and-humanity in the eyes of my persecutor ..
it's passive
pure and simple ..
it takes the abuse
period

it even goes further than that ..
laying my self out
going the extra mile
giving the coat as well as the shirt
turning the other cheek
forgiving 70 x 7
loving the one that hates me
   perhaps the most unnatural one of all
   " for if you love only those that love you,
   what about that makes you any different from everyone else? "
   .. what indeed

our significance is nailed to the tree Jesus died on
we are in-significant apart from his love
and he loves us all
even to the end ..
therein lies the significance
the search for it ends right there ..
there is no sense of preserving some sense of dignity ..
                  simply die
             over and over and over and ..
                            every day

" want to be my disciple ?
deny your self
every day
and take up your cross
and follow me .. "
said the Rabbi
 . . . .      .

sometimes we miss the rest of the story
after Jesus told Peter that
he said this
" When you were young you would tie your belt and go, wherever you wanted. 
But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and someone will tie you, and carry you somewhere you don’t want to go."  
( He said this to point out how he would die, and in that death glorify God. )
After saying this, He told him, 
   " Follow Me”

sorta like, " Peter, you love me ? give your life for me by taking care of my people
you will die for it
now, follow me "
that is a tall order
there is no significance in that, not humanly-speaking, for there is no human glory
only suffering and death

paradoxically, true significance is found in death
unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. 
But if it dies, it produces many seeds ..

mine is to inculcate in my own self the fullness of Jesus
by his Spirit
laying my self out
in all my nakedness
for the kingdom of God
regardless of the abuse it generates ..
regardless

the truth is there is no greater love
than that a man should lay down his life for a friend
and Jesus said
to me
" you want to be my disciple ?
take up your cross every day and do like i do
think like i think
attitude like i attitude
die like i die
always with my neighbour in view
forget your self
remember me
then follow me"

and he showed it to us
when he washed the feet of his own followers
and shared bread and wine
in memory of
his death to come in a few hours ..
his death

there's my example
and my life

where do you go for your significance  ?

to judge is to divide . . ~|~

ran into someone last night
she's in a program, probably to detox from alcohol
while she's in there her 2 young girlchildren went to stay with their dad and his wife in another state

he called her a couple nights ago while she was in a class
she missed the call

i asked how she was doin' ..
she said she needed prayer
and her children need prayer ..
he shot himself in the head
he's dead

vet
suffering from serious ptsd

..  ..   . .    .   .

i'm aware we all have stresses
we live in our little worlds with our stresses
can't pay the bills, kids, marital issues, work issues ..

sometimes
it's a good idea to step back a bit
engage reverse gear
find a lonely shade tree
shoot the moon
breathe
settle my brain
balance .. .     .

who am i to think my issues are so dread when she mourns the loss of her ex and the tragic consequences to those girls and her own undoing of life

.. .      .

2 people living in a camper
used to be on the street
for years
did dope and stuff
slept in the bushes
pulled themselves out of the dread of meth and alcohol addiction
and struggle still to stay 'free'
older people with health problems that accompany the drug life and the homeless life
just found a place to live
a place you can actually move around in without the whole gizmo shaking and swaying ..
finally

i walked into the abandoned camper yesterday
and was amazed at the ... mess
how could anyone live in there
2 sick people who couldn't even gather the strength to clean their place

the change'll do them good ..

.. . .       .

who am i to judge ?     ?

me?
judge?

me       ?

not me  ...

got my own judgments to declare on my own self
several of them
many

..     .

a man once postulated that the original sin entombed in the image of eating from the 'treeoftheknowledgeofgoodandevil' was
presuming to stand in the place of judge
and declare good from evil
presuming to be God

there is no god but God
and i ain't God

my presumption is simply presumptuous
that i can look at another person and charge them with thisorthat ..
" how could she have gotten herself into that, what with 2 young children " ..
" how could they live in a slummess like that for so long " ..

who am i to judge ?     ?

me?
judge?

me       ?

not me  ...

mine is to accept
to embrace
without judgment
without prejudice
even as God embraces me
in Jesus

for God's sake and in Jesus' name ..

children ..

2 young boys walked in today
around 5 a.m. ..

blew my mind
couldn't be more than 12 or 13
12 or 13 and on the street ???? ?  ?
really ?

how do you handle that
rather, how do they handle that   ?

one of them looks like he could be on the way to trouble
like he wants to be a bad dude
flicking his lighter
handling stuff
playin' the game

the other has perfect manners
well-demeanoured

o God ...
what's going on ? ?   ?

yesterday on the streets ..

i walked into town yesterday
hung out on the streets for a few hours with my cam
watched
clicked
walked
sat
listened

i keep telling myself
i need to spend more time in the streets
and this reinforced it

i saw this girl
gave her something
asked if i could take a pic from behind so i didn't show her face
and walked away
she looked so young ..
i went back and asked her how old she was
18

i kept walking
shooting
watching

this obviously homeless woman walked by
her hair done in a classy swept fashion
dress
boots
i think she saw me notice her
her demeanour picked-up
she walked by and stopped 30 or 40 feet away
i realized she probably saw me look at her, so i turned away, talking to my friend on the phone
suddenly there was this verbal explosion
loud
angry
for all of a minute
i couldn't understand what she was saying
neither could i understand what just happened
.. .   .   .. .


there were street-musicians

some of them very good
children dancing to the music
some people drop money into the guitar case

someone sitting alone
under a tree
staring off into their distance
thinking, maybe
reminiscing, maybe
wishing  ?




some kid
stuff by a bench
writing

and Cloud Dancer
or Star Gazer
or whoever, i forget
been on the street for many years
can roll with one hand
extrovert
likes to chat

i learned i know very little about people
especially my homeless friends

i need to know
i want to know
it doesn't bode well to be trying to help people when i don't understand them much
their motivation
their attitudes
problems
worldview

i keep telling myself
i need to spend more time in the streets

i intend to

for them
for Jesus
for kingdom

~|~   .. .

tonight .. . .

i stood on the street
1:30 a.m.
just standing
looking
trying to imagine what i would be doing now if i was homeless

probably i'd found something to eat
and then hunted around for a night spot
somewhere i figured i wouldn't be seen
my dark clothing helps a bit
and the sleeping bag is not outstanding

it had been another day in Paradise
panhandling a bit
holding a sign that asked for help
food at the church on the hill
and again, just before bed, off the dollar menu

i was cold
it's only feels-like-47
but it feels colder

i been doing this too long
too many nights cold
some wet
some no sleep

tough to sleep when you're wondering what's next
or who
and if it will be tonight
again

i take another swig
maybe the rum will help dull the windchillfactor
maybe it'll offer a bit of sleep tonight
maybe it'll dull me just enough to laugh at the worry
pretend it's all a joke
and i'm overreacting
again

another swig
another smoke
last one for tonight

and tomorrow  ?

tomorrow is today is yesterday is everydayallyeareveryyear

there is no tomorrow
there is no today
only now
here
in this bag clutching my passport and wallet and flashlight

there's the moon
big one

. .   .....    .   . .       . . ..     .   . ..  .    .    .. . . ....   . .

God .. .  .
where are you

more purple shoebox and dirt and stuff ..

some time ago i posted this on another blog ..

http://asthekingdomturns.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-purple-shoebox-covered-in-dirt.html

i haven't seen those 2 but very occasionally since then
they're hurting
maybe they stay away because they can't take the pain
maybe they're drugged-out because they don't know how to handle the pain of homelessness and grief

whatever their reason(s) i'm just here
whenever i can be here
for them

i think too they don't want to be around me much
maybe they don't want anyone too close to them
they feel like they're being watched
judged ..

whatever their reason(s) i'm just here
whenever i can be here
for them

it's not difficult
it's simple
really ..
do what Jesus did

if you're not sure what that means
read the gospels
over and over and over
...

love
   rising in a blaze from the ashes
      of the purple shoebox
one day
maybe soon

no time to waste
go
and do
now
in Jesus' name

why do we expect to not get hit ? ..

ya.. i've said it before ..
but, wuh  ?
it deserves repeating

it's a sure thing ~ when you stepout to do something for the Kingdom, you're going to get hit
sometimes you get hit hard all upfront
sometimes it's a lifelong hit and the hits don't stop coming, ever
they plague you the entire journey ..
that's life in the Kingdom lane
and you have no control over it

that sits right in the middle of a fallen world
fallen humanity
creation under bondage ..

things simply don't work the way it was intended when the Creator created
reason: intrusion by the enemy of Creator
misdirection
misinformation
misguidance
always trying to bring Godness down and ruin Kingdom initiative ..

just remember this one thing ..
if you are for the Kingdom like that
you have someone on your team that's got your back
you will have troubles
but he's with you, working however he can to add your work to the Kingdom
to amalgamate the movements happening in his name

and his name is Jesus

he been there/done that
walked that trail
been shot at and beaten down and abused
much of that by his own people ( despite the current theology they weren't to blame .. )

so .. when you get hit
lose an arm or a day of progress or a person on your team or financing or ...
go to Jesus
remind him you are in this for him
ask him to help you to stepbackup to the plate
bat in hand ( the one that's left )
ready to face the next ball
always in his name
for the Kingdom

there is
no
greater call
in this world

selah ..


it falls within the scope of ' take up your cross '

do it

for the Kingdom
for Jesus
for God

it's your cross ..

~|~

a piece of dead wood .. ~|~

a piece of wood
dead wood
stumbling gait
sweating brow
one purposeful step
   then another
forward
uphill

one mortal soul
one life
one motivation
one purpose
shoulder that wood
and walk on
forward
uphill

pick it up
every day
walk on under its weight
feel the roughness bite
broken skin
bloody burden
bloodied me

under its imposing presence
I am
it's shadow ever before me
shoulders bent
struggling to look up
forward
ever onward
homeward bound

journey under that wooden burden
dead wood
my death

my dead wood
mine
smells of my sweat
stained with my blood
a peculiar piece of wood
none other like it
mine

under its strain I live
alive
by its death I live
thrive
outside mortal
yet within mortal ..

real life
out of death
dying
to live
loosing 'bios' life
for 'zoe' life

the life of God
set loose in me through Jesus
blessed rabbi
master
friend

i die daily
on that cross
to live

he said if i was to be his disciple
i need to deny my self
shoulder that cross every day
and follow him

follow him

i follow him

~|~

Lenten fasting .. possibilities and opportunities and twists

i admit it

i wondered if i was being reprobative, as in denying the faith

right there in the sanctuary

in the very midst of a sober-minded fellowship surrounding Lent

Lent is the traditional christian period of the 40 days leading up to Easter ..

back home, where there is a strong Anglican and Roman Catholic influence

it involved denial, blackness, remorse, solemnity ..

a truly sombre time

i never thought i'd end-up in a church where the preacher wore robes and Lent was on the calendar ..

diss'ed that in the turning from established church to evangelicalism

now i'm back there, but not, kinda

'cause it's different

so whereas Lent became a reference or sermon in my youth/evangelical churches

it's now back on the agenda for me

a time of reflection, introspective, deliberative, look-at-myselfive

( i confess - most of my christian life has been in the Lenten mode, at least privately .. i am wont to be introspective and penitential .. a closet beat-up-on-my-self kindalike )

so there i was

sitting in the sanctuary listening to this wiseman reflect on it in his usual come-at-it-from-a-different-angle way

which usually engages me

and while he was talking about fasting
giving up something important

quoting the honourable Francis in the vein that if it doesn't hurt it's not much of a fast ..

i got that

and then this fleeting (?) thought ..

smack dab in the midst of what-to-give-up-for-Lent ..

i wonder ..

is there any room in there for taking-on something for Lent

as in turning the coin over ..

rather than giving-up something, focusing on involving my self more in something with my God and his Kingdom in mind ..

i never heard of it

never thought of it before in a fasting context

so it sat in the back of my mind, gestating

and then i ran across this ..

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bishop-stacy-sauls/ash-wednesday_b_4905883.html?utm_hp_ref=religion

i come to you ..

my Godparent
i come to you
none other

amidst all the hype and dribble permeating the religious scene in this day
the slow and steady undermining of Scripture by those that should know better
and it's reflection on you
i come to you
because you are honourable and gracious
and intimate in Jesus
and that answers a lot for me right there

thanks for loving me
and for being so demonstrative in it
on that cross

struggling we are
but fullofhope
as per those very Writings

thy Kingdom come and will be done here, in this world
soon
don't allow the hope to fade in us
help us in our unbelief
as weak as we are
prone to wander

above all things
help us to love you and to love everyone we meet, down to our enemies
and to somehow give thanks in everything

for the Kingdom is yours as is the power and the glory
for ever
age unto age unto ..

i bless your holy name

in Jesus' name

one day

one day
i think i will not be hungry any more
or dirty anymore
or cold anymore
or wet anymore
not alone
anymore
i think

i have this hope
amidst the darkness in which i travel
hope of freedom to be human
to be alive in fullnesss
accepted because
i am

i have this dream
yet not a dream
that goodness will prevail in the universe one day
and things will be put right
for all everywhere

i am one of all
i am in everywhere

the hope swells not from dream
but from promise
anticipating fulfillment
looking for reconciliation
putting things right
that promise is of God
that hope is Jesus

reconciliation is coming
promise
hope
for me
for everyone
everywhere

i simply can't wait

a fish or a rod ? ..

i just read an article a friend sent me some time ago
missed it somehow ..
it's all about the damage we do to homeless people when we just give them stuff .. ..

then last night i sat in a meeting involving several local churches, and homelessness was on the table
one person noted, with regards to a homeless camp initiative, that whereas warming centres were to alleviate suffering and were humanitarian in nature, homeless camps should be more long-term and 'transitional' - his point was that the goal is to lead those people through the issues they face, rebuild their confidence and sense of self worth, and guide/support them back in to society

i hear that
loud and clear
and while i've only been involved in homelessness for a short time, i do have a thought .. or 5

the person that wrote the article is a pastor
i'm not
the person that made the comment in the meeting is well-placed and experienced in homeless services
i'm not
so i come at it from the side, learning a bit here and a bit there as i go ..
take my comments with that in mind, please

1. i was struck by the comment that cold-weather warming centres are humanitarian, designed to relieve suffering ( in the context of that comment ) .. it burned in my stomach a bit - didn't feel right ..
2. the comments around hurting the homeless with need-based handouts had a similar effect ..

perhaps my ignorance is in play and i need to grow up; that's a real possibility

rabbi Jesus fed and healed and comforted with no respect-of-persons
he didn't have a sign-up sheet
he didn't have a questionnaire with standards to be met
he didn't have requirements and regulations and rules
he simply met the need
and it's a matter of speculation whether he saw many of those people again

that needs to be understood in a context, as everything does
he was a travelling prophet/potential Messiah, and probably didn't stay in a place long
and when he sent out disciples to travel with the Good News, they too were moving around, so the effect they had on a neighbourhood was not of the long-term type, with time to lead people anywhere, like through their poverty into settlement and security
Messiah was here, the kingdom of God was near, and that Good News was the pressing issue, to the Jew first and then also to the Greek
add to that his teaching to ' make disciples ' : that's a long-term involvement
so the things these people note are well-worth noting

however, it still don't sit well in my stomach
i hear the comments about giving ' a fishing pole rather than a fish ' ..
i hear that

i also know that scripture speaks to relieving need wherever you find it, whenever you see it
James speaks to that when he cites the issue of somebody begging for help, and i, with help in my pocket, wish a blessing and God's speed to the person and walk away .. narry a nod in the direction of rehabilitation; simply meet the need or not
and Messiah himself spoke to giving on the spot, and over-and-above the need to boot
walking 2 miles when asked to go 1
lending without recourse to getting back
meeting the need there and then
it's a need, after all

i see their point about homeless people taking the gift and selling it for drugs or alcohol ..
i get that

but you know what ?
i see hurting people
i see people on the edge
i smell people that need a shower
i touch people that are soaking wet, or shivering cold
i watch people that are struggling with addiction as they rock back and forth
and mental issues and emotional strain
the constant stress of living in the street

i ask you again to try hard to settle your mind for a minute or 15
to envision yourself living on the street
walk through a day in your life as a homeless person from the time the sun hits your face to the time the chill drives you to ground, and all that transpires inbetween ..
try
and then try again later
try hard
it's not easy to do

i agree the ultimate goal should be to lead people out of homelessness
if they want ( i know some sober-minded ones that like their life - met one yesterday: he's travelled for 20-something years and hit every contintnal state, on foot/bicycle/bus )

so, there is the issue of trying to get people out of a homeless cycle
and there's the issue of someone needing a shower and a clean pair of socks

i don't judge it anymore
i don't even judge the ones i know are on drugs
'cause it's mighty possible that 1/2 of them are on drugs because they're homeless
and maybe not all are homeless because they're on drugs, like we want to imagine
if a person is hungry, feed them
dirty, provide a shower and clean clothes
if you can, provide a safe place to sleep for a few hours - relieve them from the madness of trying to sleep without getting raped or .. or ..

in the doing of it, i try to engage them in conversation slowly
try to get them to feel a bit at ease
maybe want to chat about stuff
maybe even have a laugh or 3
over time maybe that translates into deeper stuff
headed in the direction of kingdom
.. maybe not

they know for the most part why i'm doing this
they understand somewhat of my motivation
some take me for a ride, play me
that's ok

the ones i can help i help

point is
while reforming homeless people is a noble endeavour
my focus right now is precisely on relieving their suffering, that humanitarian thing
even if for one day, one meal, one 4-hour sleep-in-peace

they know where to find me when they need me
that's mostly what i'm concerned about, at least for now

don't be so quick to jump on the reform bandwagon
you may lose some of those people in the process
they may not yet be ready for reform
but they still need food and clothing and shelter
and they still need to know that someone cares
and they're not as alone as they felt they were
'cause someone cares
no strings
no checklist
no questions

there's a place for that ..

{ sorry so long: i felt i was making a case against a stacked deck }

peace

abuse and homelessness and balm ..

i heard her crying, sitting in the breezeway
she covered her face as she talked
hoarse, barely audible rapid talk
I scarcely understood any of it..

I just knew she was hurting bad
distraugh
endoftherope stressness
she raced the words
her thoughts having a difficult time keeping-up
mostly she just wanted someone to talk at
there was backlogged stuff there
underneath
and some new stuff threw her over her limit, again
she was bustin' loose
seams fraying
thread lying everywhere
undone
.. she simply wanted out
enough !
and she was high
trying desperately to flush the mess
to extinguish the burning hurt of her life
. .     ............. .

abuse
abused
dead-tired of the abuse
" you can crash here tonight.. just need to do me some favors.. " ..
over and over and over.. always trade help for abuse

maybe we think of homelessness primarily in terms of
drugs
drunkenness
mental issues
dropout
as in failure as a societized human
               or
no roof
no food
no proper clothes

we ought to give serious consideration to the other abuse
the abuse of the person
emotionally
verbally
sexually
just plain ol' inhumanly

take a girl on the street
see her as worthless
trash
usable ..
go from there ..  .

it is my conviction that Jesus, to whom all judgement has been given, will take ' great pains ' to point out our abuses of the homeless

we expend much energy in driving back the forces that destroy our planet
threatened life forms
threatened water sources
threatened atmosphere
threatened plants and spaces ..

there are greater assaults in play
like the assault against our homeless human family
our brothers and daughters and mothers and grandfathers who live life on the very edge of society
the offscouring of humanity
the dregs
 ...

she has every right to be treated as human, because she is human
she deserves human
regardless

we cry over the inhumanity of child labour
and so we should
over the horror of the sex trade, especially among the youth
and so we should
over the challenge of food and potable water supply
and so we should
..
yet
there are 20,000+ homeless children on the streets of new york city today
today, 2014
amidst the massive advances across the spectrum of science

they are there in front of us
hands extended
looking for some kind of help
relief

Jesus' prayer in response to his disciples' request ' teach us how to pray ' is poignant here
for these people live from day to day
not knowing tomorrow
with no security of any kind - neither economic nor health nor physical
all is at risk for them
every day
" give us the things we need to live today "
....   . .   .

they beat her
they steal her gear on the street
homeless stealing from homeless

how much of it is a person supposed to swallow
every day  ? ?

we live with the stress of road rage and office politics and not-enough-money
pause that
and think of yourself living in the streets
with the animals, and the human animals
every day
every night

think on it
try to envision it

now ..
pray
and help every one you come across however you can
include a kind word
a hug
a listen - sometimes more significant than dollars or food

we can't solve homelessness
humanity is too selfish for that
but we can assuage some of it for someone today
and for someone tomorrow ..
one day maybe for somehundred or somethreehundred

' is there no balm in Gilead ' ? ?
we are the balm of Jesus
aromatic
soothing
refreshing
hopefull ..
but balm bottled is useless
balm is for healing
for applying to the sick the injured the raw-scarred the broken
bottled-up balm is just so much gutterwater
 .. .

by the time she left a couple hours later
she was somewhat more ' rational '
what with hot fresh soup and chicken
a hot shower
and a clean zip-up sweater
a couple cigarettes
and a listener

maybe she felt a little less like ending it all by then
i hope to see her again ..

. .  .       .

God helping me, i want to tell their story
hisstory
herstory
maybe ourstory of neglect and uncaring for our siblings created in the image of God
just like us

we are, at our core, the same

God helping me
preserving me from distraction
from being waylaid
from my own selfishness
from the drama of stress and the stress of drama

i'm headed for ' higher ground '
Lord .. lift me up and let me stand there
bringing them all with me
my homeless family
to you
rehumaned
reconciled ..
at peace and in love

shalom and shalom