engaging God ..

someone recently commented on an occasional preacher/teacher: “ he's interesting to listen to “, or similar ..
i get that .. it's always better to be engaged by a good teacher

but it begged a question in my mind .. ¿ how much of my response to being in the place of teaching/preaching is based on the ' interesting ' style of the speaker, and how much is based on my own interest in hearing from God .. ?

seems to me we have weighted the ' church ' experience way too far on the side of the presenter(s) and presentation and far too light on the side of us ..
we ' go to church ' as if we're heading to the gym, a movie or a concert, looking for presentation and performance, titillation and entertainment, perhaps engagement
maybe (more often than we care to admit) to have someone tell us what's right, wrong, what to do, what the Bible ' says ' ..
as if to say ' I went to church ' is a major issue, a defining mark in my discipleship to Jesus ..

maybe the problem is with the church and its format ..
and maybe the problem is with me ..

as always, I could be wrong

somehow I feel that my discipleship involves looking expectantly in the direction of God
so that wherever I am, and whenever that is, i'm expecting God to show up somehow ..
maybe in a person across from me at the coffee shop
maybe in some book i'm reading (not necessarily a religious book btw)
maybe on a walk with the dog or in the supermarket aisle or pumping gas or raking leaves in the front yard or .. maybe in the company of church

maybe the reason the speaker has to be ' interesting ' to me is that I'm not really that interested in the first place and I need to be engaged
maybe that's half the reason christianity in this west has become so much of a show
parade ..
or a soup kitchen for the soul .. stop in, get yer soup 'n salad, move on ..
like that

perhaps if I was to meet with the church in an attitude of expectancy, anticipating God's speaking to me today, here, now .. maybe then I would hear his voice
¿ maybe ? ..

selah ~

we have this penchant towards laziness in certain things, and it might well be that it presents itself largerthanlife when we head Godward, look to do Godstuff, 'cause there's someone that doesn't want us there, headed in that direction ..
(amazing thought really; ¿ isn't my spiritual life the core of who i am, why i exist ?)

a friend recently posted that part of their mindset for 2015 was to be intentional, particularly where Godstuff is concerned
and I think that's a good thing
because when I intend to see God today it's much more likely he'll ' show up ' (actually God is showing up; i simply don't recognize God) ..

think on it

..... . . . . . .

next part ..

within a day someone else commented they're tired of fighting in their christian life; too tired to keep chasing the arguments over doctrines and denominations and such; too much to handle, to keep up with; not sure who or what to believe anymore; every preacher has a different take on this or that, a new style; some don't believe the miracles in the New Testament were historical, or the virgin birth, or that Jesus was God, or came from God, or in the resurrection ..
like that

so, basically they don't any more
they're hangin' out, uninvolved for the most part
not sure where they are right now
not sure where they're headed
tired, confused, tired of the confusion ..

and btw, this person was once a frontliner for 'christianity' ..

not too difficult to figure, really
and nothing to sit in judgement on, either, for a lot of people are just precisely there, not sure anymore
too much data, too much new stuff, different stuff challenging the ' orthodox ' positions ( often a good thing btw ), too much abuse of religion by the religious, too many ' great ' christian men (preachers and all) falling by the wayside ..

it surely is a morass of conundrumity
and i feel you, friend .. i really do

besides, we are each on a journey, and at a different stage along the road
so we should be careful about judging others where they are .. we're not as far along as some, further along than others

but ..

somehow it seems that christianity (as in the real thingy Jesus inaugurated, as in the kingdom) is supposed to be a way of life
i become it
it defines me
so i don't 'do' church or christinaity .. i am a christian, I am the church

and even that fails to a certain extent; i am a democrat or republican, and that has an effect on my life, and i'm somewhat defined by that; but when the spirit of God takes up residence in me, i am changed fundamentally, as a person
a new creation
my basic makeup is different; my mind begins to change, my attitude, my likes/dislikes ..
not all at once: that would be an explosion; but over time, i become different to who ( not what ) i was before

that newlife is a combined effort between God and me
God leads, but God doesn't force, doesn't push, doesn't 'make' a person do or say or ..
mine is to be aware of the leading and submit to it

i am involved

now to this; not only do i play a part, God is watching to see how much i want this
so, my response to God's leading is one thing, but then there's this aspect of the relationship in which i'm pursuing God; i'm the one initiating ..
i want to know God more
i want God to do this in me
i want God to show me this
i'm eager for God to direct me in this or that decision
i want God to use me somehow
i want to play some part in the progression of God's kingdom
.. like that

the point of the commments is this: we need to be in on the relationship with God
it's not simply a matter of subscribing to christianity as a marker, an identifier - " i'm not jewish or muslim or hindu or .. i'm a christian "
neither is it a militant-style relationship where God dictates and i salute and obey
God defines himself ( and is defined by Jesus ) as father
father
get that ..
dad

.. selah ...

being christian means we have chosen to follow Jesus, with all that attaches, most significantly, by trying with everything there is in us to be like Jesus
that calls for a change of heart foremost, and a concomitant change of mind, of approach to life, of attitude
all this fueled from within by the holy spirit of God, spirit to spirit, working together to transform me into the likeness of Jesus himself
get that: the point of it all is to make us God's children, heirs with our Exemplar, Jesus

that calls for relentlessly going after God in every aspect of life, as if that is the point of it all, the purpose of life for me, for us
and it is
absolutely

so don't give up, even given the confusion, the rivalry, the division, the mass of messy theology and leadership .. the lights and whistles and smoke ..
keep on rockin' !
step up yourself to God and engage God personally, as if God was sitting right there with you ..
'cause God is with you
and in you
in
you
in me ..

take that seriously, as if it were real
and chase it
take God on
tell God your stuff, the good and the bad
ask God to lead you
answer your question
ask God to show-up for you and meet you, right there, in this or that situation

it's a relationship !
and he's dad

maybe it's time to stop waiting for the preacher to bring Godstuff to us on a plate, and feed us
maybe it's time to pick up the spoon ourselves
and turn towards God's face
expectantly ..

' trust God with everything there is in you;
don't rely on your own understanding of the way life is, rather acknowledge God in everything - God will lead you '
   ( prov. 3.5,6)

peace